dreams or nightmare that is the question.

why can't i lie to myself?

it's realy not to hard to just tell myself that i don't like you but i can't!

Because when ever i try to forget you; i dream about you.

I realy do HATE you!

So why do I like you aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa ...

I can not stand it anymore!

why can't you just get out and stay out of my head!

Family portrait- pink

how dare he tell my mom that she has to leave out of her own home!

She the one who works hard and all he does is scream. She cleans, she works, deals with his screaming, cooks, takes care of him and makes sure my brother and I and OK ,and to top it all she started working on the weekend so we can pay all he done! and all the other things we have to pay like the lawyer.

how dare he say that!!!!!! HE DOESN'T HAVE A RIGHT TO!

seeing her trying to hold her tears is just painful to watch!

it's like someone stapling my face and i can't do anything about it.

i can't stand him anymore! he went to his lowest this time.

i know that we have stress but we shouldn't be killing each other for it. we are a family. right?

it's just to much.

superwoman doesn't need a break!

so today i felt like i wanted to just scream and tell my dad that he's being a sexiest pig.

well yesterday my parents made me clean the whole house even though i felt bad because of what happened to belinda but i was OK with it; even though they don't make my brother do anything



so yea back to my point about my dad; so yea he was screaming at me for no reason! well He wanted me to clean the kitchen and let the boys do what every they wanted to do. oh hell no! so i had to cleaned the kitchen and then the boys were saying "at least you don't have to clean the back yard" and then i told them that i sill had to. so when i was done my dad was screaming ERIKA come and clean the backyard. Oh by the way he didn't even want the the boys to help me wash the dishes but yea I'm superwoman and don't need a break! aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa i can't take it any more he going to make me go crazy!

what death is the being?

Today seeing one of the strongest person, love, and a sister to me; cry was just heart breaking. Well Belinda goes though a lot of things in her life and now another death the same date as last year; another love one gone, (grandmother), i can't believe it. She losing her hope, she losing her fate in life. Even though all of this has happened to her; she's being strong even though i know it sill hurts her; LIFE hurt!

Also, the priest was saying how "this is the being and not the end" but what he doesn't know that it is the end of Belinda because her real family is becoming smaller and smaller in time. what i meant about her REAL family was that we're (her best Friends) are like a family; we are always there when one of us needs it. WE are a family and we are her being!

watching but lost it

you make me want to cry

when you use make me smile

now everything different

you use to pass by

and now you hid like if i can't see you watching me

but hey now i don't even like you so it's all good. your lost not mine.

I Hate everything about you -Three days grace

I hate everything about you so; Why do i like you?

so many bad things; were do i start?

1. you don't even talk to me


2. you walk away when i see you


3. you smoke ...


4. you drink


5. you not a virgin (I haven't even had my first kiss)


6. your a 10Th grader and I'm a 11 Th grader


7. your fifteen and I'm sixteen


8. you cheat on girls


9. your cousin with my cousin girl friend


10. i think about you all the time and even dream about you


11. i talk about you all the time(to my friends)


12. I like you


13. and just everything else i told sarah ....

well the good things are

1. YOUR SHY


2. you like me even though I'm ugly


3. your funny (well that's what my cousin told me)


4. your smart (your in Mr.South's europen AP class)


5. your cute


6. you have a nice smile


7. your blond hair friend is hot ^_^


8. you have curly hair (thats cute)


9. i think about you all the time


10. i dream about you


11. i like you (well it's good for you)
12. oh you like dogs^_^

see there more bad things then good so why do i like you?

"That BOY"

today i saw you and you just walked always; i was watching you and i saw that you were looking at me. Then you just left; sadly. Then all your friends left but yea did i point out that your dirty blond friend is hot lol so yea....

Then when the bell rang i was waiting for Sheena and i saw you looking at me hahahaha but yea then u were in front of me and went into Mr. south's class

I LOVE HOW YOUR SHY!

then i got home and went on ... and found you on Karla's page and added you i hope you add me but at the same time i don't because i don't want you to think I'm a dork which I'm.

oh yea hope u change all your bad things!

LOVE BUG and you don't even know!

lol i have the LOVE BUG for you and you don't even know.

I think it's funny how i never saw you around and now i see you everywhere in lunch; you don't even know that i know that you like me. hehehe

Like yesterday i saw you looking at me and my best friend Jessi and i just started laughing and she said that your like in love with me. all i said that was hahahaha...

so yea today I went with Yvonne to try to find a paper she needed for a class so i went to the other group and then i started walking back with her because Jessi and Belinda were sitting all alone were we hang out and then i saw that you were going to talk to them; well that's what it looked like you were doing but then you saw me and Belinda and Jessi told me that you said "shit" and then you just left and your friend just passed by me, and looked at me, and all i said "that was weird" and then Belinda and Jessi told me about you said shit when you saw me coming and then i started laughing!

Then Jessi was say out loud that i should just kiss you hahaha so yea i was telling her to be quit and she wouldn't!

then i walked up to Ariel because i thought she was crying; in which she wasn't and while I was walking i saw your friend looking at me, into my eyes, like you do, and i just looked down at my friend.

then in 5 period i couldn't stop thinking about you and i told Yvonne what she missed because she left to her class before all that happened and we just laughed ...

oh yea i thought it was so cute how you got all shy when you saw me hahahaha ^_^

and all i do now is listen to LOVE BUG by the Jonas brothers and think about you because you look like nick Jonas and by the way i don't even care that you look like him because i think Joe Jonas is hotter! hahahaha